You should immediately take a backpack and leave, and be alone for a while, in the nature. Because the nature offers a kind of direct connection that right now, you lack and yet need. Your body suffers from you your consciousness, being trapped “in itself” for too long, you need to open the door and free it.

Consciousness is a great servant, but an awfully master. If you feel bad about your life it's because you judge it, but at some point in life everybody needs to realize that judging life is impossible, for the simple reason that life is doing consciousness, and it's not the other way around.

Just like a branch can't judge the trunk of the tree, you shall never judge your parents and you shall never judge anything that is making you, but all the past is making you… so judging your past is disallowed from your standpoint. From the point you're standing right now, there is only “moving forward” and to do that, looking at the past is a distraction… so don't do it.

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So if you suffer when you try to “think about your life”, it's because it's painful, just like contortioning your body in order to see your ass would be as painful and as impossible… and you don't want to hurt yourself.

Your brain is not meant to do what you ask it to do, your brain is the “my life” maker, so the only thing that it's disallow to do is to try to use it on itself.

In Mathematics such a construction breaks it, as it leads to inconsistency, just like when in the past it was allowed to put a set into itself… then people realized that we could construct self-containing sets which create a paradoxe like the ancestry paradoxe, such as: “what is the set of all the sets which don't contain themselves?”. And “boom”… Mathematics breaking down.

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So, “what have I done with my life?”. “boom”, inner logic breaking down. Don't ask that question! It can't be solved by you, even if you feel confident answering that about anyone else. But is that surprising that you can't do what everyone else can?

Well, think about it: can you see yourself, with your eyes and without a mirror? No? Well, but everybody else can see you. So are you disabled or what? No you're not, your just in the same situation as everyone else.

You can't surprise yourself, yet everybody else can surprise you. You can't massage/hear/smell yourself, yet everybody else can massage/hear/smell you. You can't judge your life, yet everybody else can judge it. Because you are it, you are your life and that's why you can't take a step back from it in order to appreciate it.